Friday, September 16, 2005

i may be missing india too much!

well its my last day at work today. :-( ive really enjoyed it actually! got one more visit this morning to see another buyer and then im off to france! woohoo! cant wait to see all my girlies! :-)

got an email from srinath this morning:

You may be missing India, when you ......

....Re-wire all the lights in your house and insert a random selector
.....Start washing your clothes in the local river -id forgotten how amazing washing machines and tumble dryers were so i dout ill be going back to this one!
.....Start commuting to work on the roof of the train -it nearly came to this today!
.....Start sucking aniseed so you can spit on the wall in the yard
.....Put a 'Horn OK' bumper sticker on your car and blast horn every 3 seconds
.....Re-wire the bathroom to leave all the cables exposed
.....Start peeing in your sink
.....Set the farmers cows free to roam the streets
.....Open a market stall to sell used false teeth.
.....when at Starbucks, you get a second, empty cup and mix the milk and sugar (and cinnamon and cardamon, and . . .) into the coffee by pouring between the two, then ask for a saucer and slurp it down while standing up
.....throw stones at a stray dog
.....blow your nose into the street
.....start calling people older than you Auntie and Uncle -i do this anyway with alot of people!
.....water your garden by splashing out of a bucket, then sweep your lawn at night down the middle of the highway with only your running lights on until oncomming traffic bears down, and then honk and turn on your highbeams up for Sunday Church with coconuts, banannas and incense- at 5AM or . . on Friday at noon you unroll your prayer rug on the driveway in front of your church at hoist your butt in the air
.....gargle and spit into the sink at a restaurant after a meal
.....explain to winos you have no more pens to give the cinema, you press up against the back of the person in line ahead of you in the ticket line, then reach around in front of him and shove your money into the ticket booth, then put curry powder on your popcorn. -mmmm masala popcorn!
.....your friends are getting concerned about the way your head wobbles - they were but i think thankfully it doesnt wobble as much now! have almost perfected the 'morning sound of India' nasal and throat
....You get to wondering why ALL the light switches in your flat actually do
.....Buy a lighter and wonder why it does'nt have the extra "welder setting" like the Indian ones
.....When tea just doesn't cut it -it really doesnt! give me chai anyday! buy Kingfisher Beer when you're in Tesco's -must admit to doing this last night!! need a number two and it crosses your mind to go and crouch by the railway line -ive never thought of doing this thankfully! tell taxi drivers you've been in the UK for 39 years and that you're not a tourist

i loved it! for all of you living in India now or have done, you will agree with me! hehe!

anyways better go gotta sort out some shirts!

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